For the last 3 months, every time you've seen me, emailed me to go out, texted to ask if I was busy on a particular day, sent me an invite to your birthday or asked if I've wanted to go for a drink after work, one thought has been the first to enter my mind - I can't afford it.
Since we bought our flat 7 months ago, we've got pretty far in doing it up. The lounge is almost done (skirting boards, window frames, door frames and blinds need doing), the hallway is in a similar state, and the bedroom is coming together after we've put the cupboard doors back up. We've not touched the kitchen or bathroom, but we've dug up the concrete garden and replaced it with grass, grown from seed. So yeah, I've been busy, but in between this I've not really felt the pinch until about March of this year.
We went on a great holiday to SA at the end of Feb, and I popped pretty much everything on the credit card, only to come back and realise that I have been living in a bit of a dreamworld since we bought the house. It needs a lot more doing to it, the outside front hasn't even been TOUCHED, and it really needs some TLC.
Gah, okay, reeling it back to prevent this post from turning into an extended whinge.
The point is that hey, great, I'm 25 and I own a flat with my boyfriend. I'm getting the satisfaction of installing a washing line and a catflap, but I'm also getting the horrible feeling of letting down my friends every time I have to decline an invite out because it's not even halfway through the month and I'm in my overdraft.
I'm so sick of being skint! I'm sick of thinking about affordability over fun, and I hate that my mind now automatically converts any invitation into how much it'll cost me. The ease of socialising is always overshadowed by the questions; 'can I afford this', 'how do I decline this', or 'do my friends think I'm tight when I have to bow out of rounds and pay only for myself?'
The logical side of me knows that the things my (really very understanding) friends say when I have to explain my state of affairs are true. It'll work out in time. The work on the house will get done. There are ways of having cheap fun. I guess I just miss the freedom to say yes to everything, and the times when the only constraint was whether I was double-booking myself.
It's just a case of riding it out. Trying to keep head above water and do as much work as quickly as possible. Staying positive. And drinking lots of very cheap wine.
Since we bought our flat 7 months ago, we've got pretty far in doing it up. The lounge is almost done (skirting boards, window frames, door frames and blinds need doing), the hallway is in a similar state, and the bedroom is coming together after we've put the cupboard doors back up. We've not touched the kitchen or bathroom, but we've dug up the concrete garden and replaced it with grass, grown from seed. So yeah, I've been busy, but in between this I've not really felt the pinch until about March of this year.
We went on a great holiday to SA at the end of Feb, and I popped pretty much everything on the credit card, only to come back and realise that I have been living in a bit of a dreamworld since we bought the house. It needs a lot more doing to it, the outside front hasn't even been TOUCHED, and it really needs some TLC.
Gah, okay, reeling it back to prevent this post from turning into an extended whinge.
The point is that hey, great, I'm 25 and I own a flat with my boyfriend. I'm getting the satisfaction of installing a washing line and a catflap, but I'm also getting the horrible feeling of letting down my friends every time I have to decline an invite out because it's not even halfway through the month and I'm in my overdraft.
I'm so sick of being skint! I'm sick of thinking about affordability over fun, and I hate that my mind now automatically converts any invitation into how much it'll cost me. The ease of socialising is always overshadowed by the questions; 'can I afford this', 'how do I decline this', or 'do my friends think I'm tight when I have to bow out of rounds and pay only for myself?'
The logical side of me knows that the things my (really very understanding) friends say when I have to explain my state of affairs are true. It'll work out in time. The work on the house will get done. There are ways of having cheap fun. I guess I just miss the freedom to say yes to everything, and the times when the only constraint was whether I was double-booking myself.
It's just a case of riding it out. Trying to keep head above water and do as much work as quickly as possible. Staying positive. And drinking lots of very cheap wine.
This is a 
It's all there in your conclusion. You go, girl!
OH MY WORD! It's like you're talking about me. I had a long conversation about how I'm fed up with counting my pennies. I finally get to a stage where I'm earning better and I just seem to have more expenses - and I don't even own a house!
I know your friends understand but it is difficult. Last year, my friends planned a big skiing trip and I couldn't go with and had to explain to them that I just don't have the money. It was embarrassing but at least they understood the reason why I couldn't come.
One of my friends and I go for walks in the park or in our neighbourhoods on the weekend - it's exercise and it doesn't cost anything really!
Tons of strength to you sweets and know that I feel ya ;-) xx